Toon Talk: Yo Ho-Hum

By the time a successful film franchise hits the fourth installment, a certain formula has usually settled in. In the case of Disney’s hit Pirates of the Caribbean movies, such by-now familiar aspects include a complex plot steeped in legendary pirate lore, a rogues’ gallery of mythical and/or magical characters, enough double crosses and double-double crosses to make your eyes cross, and plenty of swashbuckling stunts and special effects spectacle.

All that, as well as Johnny Depp’s swarthy, swishy Captain Jack Sparrow, are on hand in Pirates of the Caribbean: On Stranger Tides, in theaters now. Gone are original trilogy director Gore Virbinski and lovebirds Orlando Bloom and Keira Knightley. In their place are Academy Award nominated director Rob Marshall (of the glitzy and gritty musicals Chicago and Nine fame) and a love interest for Captain Jack himself, played by Oscar winning actress Penélope Cruz.

But even with this mixture of old and new blood, On Stranger Tides is curiously lacking in excitement, as if we’ve all rode this E ticket too many times to care much any more...

UPDATE: Pirates of the Caribbean: On Stranger Tides is now available on DVD and Blu-rayfrom Amazon.com.

Click here to continue reading my Toon Talk review of Pirates of the Caribbean: On Stranger Tides at LaughingPlace.com.

PIRATES OF THE CARIBBEAN: ON STRANGER TIDES

Written by Ted Eliott and Terry Rossio

Directed by Rob Marshall

Starring Johnny Depp, Penelope Cruz, Geoffrey Rush and Ian McShane

Barbosa: You haven't changed.

Jack Sparrow: Implying the need.

It’s fitting really that the fourth installment in Disney’s PIRATES OF THE CARIBBEAN series, ON STRANGER TIDES, finds everyone’s favourite captain, Jack Sparrow (Johnny Depp) searching frantically for the fountain of youth. The franchise itself has not exuded any true vigor since the first time it sent sail and, now serving under the new direction of Rob Marshall (CHICAGO), it simply drifts aimlessly at sea while trying to recapture its former glory. Drastic changes were made to the format, most notably a major cast overhaul, to rejuvenate it and allow it to stand alone as a one-off story in hopes of keeping Disney’s treasure chest plentiful. The only strange thing about these tides though is that anyone is still watching and waiting for them to come in.

Some of the aforementioned drastic changes include the shedding of previous series regulars, Orlando Bloom and Keira Knightly, to make room for fresh blood, Penelope Cruz and Ian McShane. Also gone are the overly complicated plot lines incorporated into the second and third installments to justify their existence. All they managed to do was infuriate audiences and suck all the fun out of the franchise anyway so that’s no loss. Instead, this adventure is meant to exist unto itself and it most certainly does this. It just doesn’t bother having any fun in the process. Depp returns as the character he has brought nothing new to for years now and he joins a bunch of other pirates, including Cruz, whom he had some sort of sordid affair with way back when, as they search for the location of the fountain of youth. Aside from an encounter with some of the most vicious mermaids I’ve ever seen, this amounts to little more than a lot of walking and talking in the jungle.

The truth is there is nothing strange about these tides really and this is why the film doesn’t work. A new director and a new approach were supposed to thrust some fresh gusts of wind into the aging franchise’s sails but all it truly manages is to raise this sunken ship to the surface again and leave it there to rock monotonously back and forth, in unnecessary 3D no less. (This by no means applies to McShane, who is the only point of interest past those scary mermaids.) Considering previous pirate complaints centered around how confusing it all got, I am surprised that Marshall leaves us with more confusion this time around too – more specifically, why is this series still going? Oh right, treasure.

Setting Sail

For a while now I've wanted to start a film blog. For an even longer while, I made excuses as to why I wasn't starting one: not enough time, too many blogs, "no one is going to read it," and now a momentary pause as I figure out just what to write for my first post on Sam Watches Movies.

And so here is the introduction! Again, if you missed the banner beneath the blog title, my name is Sam. I'm what is widely considered a film buff, I watch movies as much as possible with a focus on trying to see new movies. New to me, that is, not necessarily the newest movies of the year. Because to me, a classic movie isn't a classic if you haven't seen it before.

My taste in film is part populist (The Dark Knight, Love Story, Pirates of the Caribbean, Ghost, Back to the Future, Anchorman, Toy Story 3) and part respected drama or comedy (Casablanca, The Silence of the Lambs, Michael Clayton, Up in the Air, American Beauty). Separating the two entities is impossible. To me, your favorite movies are the best movies; the movies you love are the ones you'll remember forever, not just because they're well-written, well-acted, or considered important but because you connect to them.

Also, I'll be writing in-depth Awards Season coverage when the time comes and retrospective commentary of Oscars past, in addition to film reviews (new and old), and general articles focusing on performances, directors, actors, and craftsmen.

Buckle your seatbelts, this is gonna be a bumpy ride.